


The Worst Advice Ever

by Chonisexual



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: But like only a little bit, Chat!fic, Chatting & Messaging, Cheryl had one line about wanting to be godmother so now I made it a thing, Cheryl just really loves Jason and his babies, Crack, Crack Taken Seriously, Cute!Cheryl, DIY, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Humor, I wanted more of Kevin and Toni and Polly ect so I did it myself, Jokes About Twincest, Maybe some angst, No Angst, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Sadness, Slight Canon Complaint, Texting, Toni really loves making fun of Cheryl, You're Welcome, cuteness, ships are mostly background
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2018-11-29
Packaged: 2019-03-13 17:48:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 10,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13575768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chonisexual/pseuds/Chonisexual
Summary: A Riverdale chat fic. (Will probably add more characters/relationships later on)





	1. I Hate You All

**Cherry.Bombshell started a chat called I Hate You All**

**Cherry.Bombshell added Nancy_Drew, WriterGuy, GingerNinja, Veronicakins and GayKeller**

Cherry.Bombshell: Go die in a hole

Nancy_Drew: Who?

Cherry.Bombshell: All of you.

WriterGuy: Should I even ask why or just assume it's you being your typical bitchy self?

GayKeller: I vote second option.

GayKeller: This better be good, Cheryl, you're seriously cock-blocking me.

Veronicakins: You finally get Fangs' number ;)

GayKeller: Thanx again, V

Cherry.Bombshell: Can you self-absorbed assholes not talk about yourselves for 2 seconds?

Nancy_Drew: You're one to talk...

GingerNinja: Ok wasn't going to join in but.... Dammmmmn, Betty. BUUUUUUURN!

Cherry.Bombshell: Like I was saying, the B&G just published that Mommy's a stripper. Who did it? And how did you know?

WriterGuy: LOL, she wasn't exactly hiding it.

Cherry.Bombshell: Yeah, well, I'm the one who had to face her fiery wrath. She thinks that I ratted her out b/c I'd be soooo proud of having a stripper Mom. NOT!

Nancy_Drew: She didn't like hit you.... Did she?

Cherry.Bombshell: OMG, mind your own business Cooper.

WriterGuy: If we minded our own business you'd still be living with your brother's killer. So...

WriterGuy: A thanks maybe?

Cherry.Bombshell: Ha! As if.

J.J: That's v rude Cher. Be nice to Jughead.

Cherry.Bombshell: Jason? I missed you so much!!!!!!

GingerNinja: WTF?????? Jason's dead.

J.J: Dat's true. There's good WIFI in Heaven :)

GingerNinja: Makes sense.

Cherry.Bombshell: Wait a minute... Dat? Jason would never use slang.

J.J: Old Jason's dead, bae.

J.J: But dis the New Jason.

Cherry.Bombshell: Jughead?

WriterGuy: What?

Cherry.Bombshell: Betty?

Nancy_Drew: No, Cheryl, I'm not pretending to be your dead twin brother.

Cherry.Bombshell: Kevin?

GayKeller: Don't blame the gay's.

Cherry.Bombshell: LODGE?

J.J: ;)

Nancy_Drew: OMG, V that's so messed up!!!

J.J: Like Cheryl then? Haha

WriterGuy: Hahahahahaha LOL!

Cherry.Bombshell: Like I said... I hate you all.

Nancy_Drew: But we're family :(

GingerNinja: WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

GayKeller: Archie... Sweet, dumb Archie.

GingerNinja: You're mean :(((((((

GayKeller: Deal with it, douche.

Cherry.Bombshell: And suddenly, there's one less loser in this chat.

Cherry.Bombshell: Welcome Keller to the Cool Club.

GayKeller: Ha! No thanx, psycho.

J.J: r e j e c t e d

Nancy_Drew: V... Change it back, it's seriously creeping me out.

Veronicakins: That's not me...

Cherry.Bombshell: Not funny, Lodge.

J.J: Guess who's back, back again..... JASON!!!!!!

GingerNinja: ???????

J.J: Jk. It's me... Toni. Thought that stuck-up princess could be taught a lesson LOL

**J.J changed their name to PinkHair_Serpent**

Cherry.Bombshell: Dirty Serpents....

WriterGuy: TAKE THAT BACK!!!

Cherry.Bombshell: Nah.

Cherry.Bombshell: Btw, I'm a QUEEN not a Princess.

PinkHair_Serpent: Wow... So arrogant.

Nancy_Drew: Yeah, that's Cheryl for you. Stuck-up, arrogant bitch.

Cherry.Bombshell: What happened to being family?

Veronicakins: You're 3rd cousins, not sisters.

Cherry.Bombshell: Wow, serious discrimination here guys. Didn't bring that up when Betty said it...

WriterGuy: Discrimination? Kinda like what you're doing to us Serpents then????

Cherry.Bombshell: But you deserve it. I don't.

Nancy_Drew: LOL!!!! You a comedian?

Nancy_Drew: Sorry guys, that was my Mom. Again.... :/

PinkHair_Serpent: Why do I get the feeling that wasn't Mama Cooper and Betty's using her as an excuse?

Veronicakins: Probs because she is.


	2. Cheryl Blossom vs Alison DiLaurentis

**Nancy_Drew changed the name to Cheryl Blossom vs Alison DiLaurentis???**

PinkHair_Serpent: It's literally 2 in the morning.....

Nancy_Drew: I know but I couldn't get to sleep.

Cherry.Bombshell: Too busy thinking about me????? ;)

WriterGuy: Did you just flirt with your 3rd cousin?

Cherry.Bombshell: Shut up, Shithead.

WriterGuy: At least I don't flirt with my 3rd cousin.....

PinkHair_Serpent: Probably slept with her twin brother too. Incest much?

Cherry.Bombshell: EWWW! Me and JJ never had SEX that would be twincest you gross bitch.

Veronicakins: You told me he was the handsomest...

GayKeller: E X P O S E D

GingerNinja: Why are you all up???

PinkHair_Serpent: My neighbours are yelling super loudly :((

PinkHair_Serpent: RIP sleep

Cherry.Bombshell: Ha! That's what you get for being a Serpent

PinkHair_Serpent: Oh? What were you doing up? Fantasying about your dead twin brother?

Nancy_Drew: OMG guys! Answer the question

GayKeller: Cheryl would win hands down. She's psycho.

Veronicakins: Idk so was Alison...

Cherry.Bombshell: She's also a huge softie. Literally all I'd have to do was send some creepy dolls or some boring crap. It'd be super easy.

GayKeller: See?

Cherry.Bombshell: BTW, I was trying to get to sleep but Mommy has another 'customer' in her bedroom and they're moaning WAY TOO LOUD!

GingerNinja: Wow... Your life is super messed up.

Cherry.Bombshell: I know! Literally hate Mommy soooo much.

PinkHair_Serpent: Thought it was Archie's job to be the Angsty Teen??

GingerNinja: HEY!!!!

Cherry.Bombshell: hEY!!!!

GayKeller: I was texting Fangs. But now I feel super boring compared to Cheryl's thing :(

Veronicakins: Would you rather be boring and happy or crazy and miserable???

Cherry.Bombshell: I'M NOT MISERABLE!!!

Nancy_Drew: Really? Cause your twin's dead, you dad killed him then killed himself and your mom's a stripper bitch. I'd be pretty miserable if I were you...

WriterGuy: I taught you well :')

Cherry.Bombshell: OMG if Mommy doesn't shut up I'm actually going to punch someone!!!!

PinkHair_Serpent: Wait... You still call you mom 'Mommy'?!? Is that a rich girl thing or...?

GingerNinja: Yea, I think so. Ronnie still calls her dad 'Daddy' so...

Veronicakins: ARCHIE!!!

GayKeller: E X P O S E D

Nancy_Drew: Are you going to keep doing that?

GayKeller: Only if someone's exposed. Hopefully Cheryl lol

WriterGuy: We don't need to expose her. Everyone know she's crazy b/c she's an attention-seeking bitch.

Cherry.Bombshell: OMG why does everyone think I'm crazy?!

PinkHair_Serpent: Cuz you are?

Nancy_Drew: Yea, I bet you burned down Thornhill, Cheryl.

Cherry.Bombshell: How did you know?

GingerNinja: WHAT?!

GayKeller: SLAY!!!

Nancy_Drew: I was joking....

Cherry.Bombshell: Hahahahahaha so was I.....

Cherry.Bombshell: Hahaha

WriterGuy: Sure Jan...

Veronicakins: Yea, your mom's a straight-up bitch. No way she saved you from a fire.

GayKeller: Also, how would you be perfectly fine while your mom was all burnt up and shit if she saved you? Like, wouldn't you both be equally burned???

Cherry.Bombshell: I have to... water my chair???

Nancy_Drew: Even Archie knows you're lying.

GingerNinja: WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN???

GayKeller: That you're dumb.

Cherry.Bombshell: Yea let's go talk about how dumb Archie is

PinkHair_Serpent: Nice try, bitch.

Nancy_Drew: Time for a game for 20 questions...

WriterGuy: 1. Did you burn down Thornhill?

**Cherry.Bombshell has signed out**

GingerNinja: So we all agreed she burned down Thornhill?

GayKeller: Yep

Nancy_Drew: Awww. I was looking forward to making Cheryl suffer :(

Veronicakins: Dark Betty out to play??

Nancy_Drew: Maybe.

Nancy_Drew: This documentary about some guy who ate his gf is so boring...

WriterGuy: O.o

PinkHair_Serpent: Damn, you almost as crazy as that crazy bitch Cheryl.

GayKeller: Lol no one's as crazy as Cheryl

GayKeller: I miss her :(

GayKeller: Is it weird that I miss that crazy bitch?

WriterGuy: Is it weirder that I miss her too???

PinkHair_Serpent: Ugh, just add the crazy bitch. It's so vanilla without her :(

Nancy_Drew: But I'm kinda dark??

Veronicakins: Yea sometimes but even then you're vanilla dark.

GayKeller: Ikr, Betty drowned some douche but Cheryl burned her fucking house down. Winner hands down.

Nancy_Drew: :(

Nancy_Drew: But my mom's got a shady, secret past. Does that help??

Veronicakins: You're kind of just a bland white girl with a crazy family. Nothing special.

GayKeller: Meanwhile Cheryl's a crazy ginger with a crazy ginger family.

GingerNinja: Wow, you guys are so rude lol

PinkHair_Serpent: I don't wanna be the one to add her. Veronica add her

Veronicakins: Why me???

WriterGuy: Who was at Cheryl's memorial sleepover?

Nancy_Drew: Who helped Cheryl after she ran off stage??

GingerNinja: Who did Cheryl send her suicide note to?

PinkHair_Serpent: Suicide note??? Damn, you North Siders are crazy

GayKeller: No just Cheryl

**Veronicakins added Cherry.Bombshell**

Cherry.Bombshell: Awwwww can't live without my fabulous charm??? :D

WriterGuy: We just wanted to make your life even more hellish.

Cherry.Bombshell: I can see all your chats

PinkHair_Serpent: Shit

Cherry.Bombshell: I don't know whether to hug or kill you all... Maybe I'll do both???

GayKeller: HUG! Please hug!!! I'm too young and pretty to die

Cherry.Bombshell: Wow and people call me self-absorbed????????


	3. Bi or Gay??

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know 2 chapters in one day!!! I'm on a roll haha

GingerNinja: Is it just me or was Josie super hot tonight??

Cherry.Bombshell: Usually everything you say is irrelevant trash but... True.

GayKeller: A fellow gay???

PinkHair_Serpent: Are you kidding me? She's bi all the way.

GayKeller: STAY IN YOUR LANE SNAKE!!!!

GayKeller: You have Katy Perry, you can't take Cheryl too!!!!!

Veronicakins: Wow, I was just here to have a good time and I've just walked into a full-on war.

Cherry.Bombshell: Yea. It's not the only battle in my honour ;)

Nancy_Drew: Who was it between.... Jason and yourself? LOL

Nancy_Drew: MOM!!! Get your own account instead of using mine all the time OMG

WriterGuy: Hahaha your mom is so funny

PinkHair_Serpent: YEA WELL YOU HAVE ELLEN AND NEIL PATRICK HARRIS YOU PRIVILAGED SHIT!!!

GingerNinja: Guys... I'm pretty sure Cheryl is straight....

WriterGuy: No

GayKeller: No

PinkHair_Serpent: No

Nancy_Drew: No

DieBlossomsDie1521: No

Nancy_Drew: OMG!!! Mom, how did you get in here???

WriterGuy: She's funny....

Cherry.Bombshell: Nice name Mrs. Cooper *eye roll*

DieBlossomsDie1521: I had to add numbers b/c the name was already taken. What do you think about that?

Cherry.Bombshell: I originally tried AliceCooper'sABitch..... That was taken too.

Nancy_Drew: Oh yea. It's Polly's haha

DieBlossomDie1521: You better not be lying to me, Elizabeth

Nancy_Drew: No, I'm not....

DieBlossomDie1521: Have fun finding a black dress for your sister's funeral

**DieBlossomDie1521 signed out**

Nancy_Drew: Shit

WriterGuy: Hahahahahaha

GayKeller: Back to more important matters....

GayKeller: Cheryl..... Gay or bisexual???

GingerNinja: Well she kissed me so..... Bi?

Veronicakins: You can kiss people you're not into. I kissed Betty

WriterGuy: WOT???

WriterGuy: Oh and gay. She's literally like a Killer of Men or something.

WriterGuy: Really I'm only saying it for hope of the male population

Veronicakins: I'm guessing bi. She was so doing twincest w/ Jason

Nancy_Drew: I literally don't care

Nancy_Drew: I think my mom is legit going to kill Polly???

Cherry.Bombshell: OMG!!! We're talking about ME not your stupid ass irrelevant sister!!!!

Nancy_Drew: Fine.... Bi, I guess??

PinkHair_Serpent: LOL!!! Josie told me. Girl's bi

GayKeller: Proof or it didn't happen

PussycatBeyonce: Yep. Cher's bi. It's honestly so obvious hahaha

Cherry.Bombshell: I was going to make them fight to the death in my honour!!!! You ruined my perfect plan, bitch!!! :((((((

PussycatBeyonce: Still locked out and bored????

**Cherry.Bombshell kicked PussycatBeyonce out of the chat**

Veronicakins: I'm bored too.... Wanna come over???

Cherry.Bombshell: Only if there's cherries and/or strawberries milkshakes

Veronicakins: Yea, my mom's obsessed with cherries

Cherry.Bombshell: Cool. Be there in 15

GayKeller: Did I just stumble into the Twilight Zone or are Cheryl and Veronica actually getting along???? O.o

Nancy_Drew: They've always got along. They bond through intense comebacks and manipulative schemes

WriterGuy: Makes sense

Cherry.Bombshell: That's how I bond with everyone

PinkHair_Serpent: So every time you call me and Jug 'Dirty Serpents' you're bonding? Awwww!

Cherry.Bombshell: Shut up and go back to your non-existent home

PinkHair_Serpent: Awww???


	4. Never Have I Ever

GayKeller: Who wants to play Never Have I Ever?

WriterGuy: Why?

GayKeller: Does there need to be a reason??

Cherry.Bombshell: Whatever, I'm in. High-key pissed off

GingerNinja: Why?

Veronicakins: LOL might be something to do with Betty saying Cheryl's not a real redhead haha

Nancy_Drew: I'm just saying, wouldn't be the first Blossom Conspiracy

Cherry.Bombshell: Die Cooper Die!!!!!

PinkHair_Serpent: Aren't you both the same family? So Cheryl's basically telling the Blossom/Cooper's to die including herself??

WriterGuy: Oh yeah, that's true.

Cherry.Bombshell: Shut up and let's play the stupid gay's game

GayKeller: Rude.

GayKeller: Ok, first rule tho everyone needs to take shots and type 'i' when they done it

GingerNinja: How will you know if we've taken the shots??

Cherry.Bombshell: He won't but I will. I'm everywhere, bitch

GingerNinja: O.o

Nancy_Drew: Can we take shots yet? That was seriously creepy..........

GayKeller: SILENCE!!!!!

GayKeller: Thank you. Never Have I Ever called my mom a whore

PinkHair_Serpent: i

Cherry.Bombshell: i

Veronicakins: i

WriterGuy: You're all horrible people. Be ashamed

Cherry.Bombshell: At least I don't jerk off to old murder cases in my spare time

GingerNinja: Ew!!!! Now I'm thinking about it GET IT OUT OF MY HEAD!!!

Nancy_Drew: Ok, my turn.

Nancy_Drew: Never Have I Ever dyed my hair ginger

WriterGuy: i

Veronicakins: Cheryl you didn't say 'i'

Cherry.Bombshell: I hate you all

GayKeller: Wait.... Are we not going to talk about the fact Jughead dyed his hair ginger????

GingerNinja: I remember that. I helped him w/ it

PinkHair_Serpent: Yea then he got high and pretended to be Jason

Nancy_Drew: He said it would help us find out who killed him

Cherry.Bombshell: LOL why wasn't I invited??

Cherry.Bombshell: I miss Jay-Jay :(

Veronicakins: Moving on from that v weird turn of events.... Never Have I Ever burned down my house

Cherry.Bombshell: ....i

GingerNinja: Wait... You actually burned down Thornhill???

GayKeller: You dumb, insanely hot boy...

Veronicakins: STOP FLIRTING WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!

GayKeller: He's hot tho :(

Nancy_Drew: I thought you were into Fangs??

GayKeller: What he doesn't know won't hut him

GayKeller: What do you say Archie? ;)

Cherry.Bombshell: EWWWWW!!!! SOMEONE GET THE BLEACH!!! YOU NEED TO STOP!!!! STOP!!!

PinkHair_Serpent: OMG you're literally so Extra.

GingerNinja: Never Have I Ever seriously injured anyone

WriterGuy: i

PinkHair_Serpent: i

Cherry.Bombshell: i

Nancy_Drew: Well that was predictable...

AliceCooper'sABitch: Never Have I Ever BETRAYED my sister!!!!

Nancy_Drew: haha... Hi Polly

Cherry.Bombshell: Lol love the username ;)

Veronicakins: YOU'RE ALIVE!!!!!!

AliceCooper'sABitch: Yea, I'm as surprised as you are. Really sold me out there, SIS!!!!

Cherry.Bombshell: Does that mean I'm the godmother now???!!!

Nancy_Drew: CHERYL

WriterGuy: CHERYL

Veronicakins: CHERYL

Cherry.Bombshell: Totally joking haha

Cherry.Bombshell: But seriously, Betty was super bitchy. Maybe you should reconsider???

PinkHair_Serpent: You planned this didn't you?

Cherry.Bombshell: HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME OF SUCH A THING, TONI TOPAZ!!!!

AliceCooper'sABitch: Ugh whatever. Just be lucky the WIFI is horrible in this farm

AliceCooper'sABitch: And it's my day to clean the stables :(

GingerNinja: Umm... Have fun??

**AliceCooper'sABitch signed out**

Cherry.Bombshell: So I'm totally the godmother now, right???

Nancy_Drew: You're evil

Cherry.Bombshell: Evilly hot??? ;)

WriterGuy: That doesn't even make sense...

Cherry.Bombshell: SHUT UP NO ONE ASKED YOU JUDGEHEAD!!!!

Veronicakins: Geez.... Take a chill pill

Cherry.Bombshell: I'm an independent woman. You can't tell me what to do!!!

PinkHair_Serpent: Slay???

GayKeller: SLAY

GayKeller: Still want to get turnt tho... Anyone who wants a good time meet @ Pop's???

Veronicakins: What time??

GayKeller: idk... 7?

WriterGuy: I'm already here I've been here for hours

Cherry.Bombshell: Of course you have you hobgoblin

Cherry.Bombshell: Literally all you do is sit at Pop's writing your depressing story about MY DEAD BROTHER!!!

GingerNinja: Salty much

Cherry.Bombshell: Suck a dick, Andrews

GayKeller: Preferably mine ;)

Veronicakins: KEVIN!!!

PinkHair_Serpent: Dammnnn.... North Siders are crazy...

Cherry.Bombshell: SHUT UP TONI!!!

Veronicakins: SHUT UP TONI!!!

Nancy_Drew: SHUT UP TONI!!

GayKeller: SHUT UP TONI !!!

GingerNinja: SHUT UP TONI!!!

WriterGuy: True..


	5. How to figure out if you're bi???

Nancy_Drew: How to figure out if you're bi???

GayKeller: Are you serious? BETTY TOO? MY OWN BEST FRIEND???

Cherry.Bombshell: Do you wanna make babes with Zach Efron??

Nancy_Drew: Yes

Cherry.Bombshell: Do you wanna make babes with Megan Fox?

Nancy_Drew: ....Yes

PinkHair_Serpent: Girl, you're bi

Veronicakins: OMG!!!! This group is officially almost as diverse as my old New York friends!!! Yay!

GayKeller: Almost?

Cherry.Bombshell: Friends?

WriterGuy: Wow, I have a bi girlfriend

Nancy_Drew: You're saying that as a good thing right? Like we're not going to break-up???

WriterGuy: We're good :)

Cherry.Bombshell: Wow, I'm so hot

Veronicakins: OMG way to ruin the moment

Cherry.Bombshell: That was the point, moron.

GayKeller: Are you an actual demon?

Nancy_Drew: Maybe we should burn sage, that would keep her out

Veronicakins: I tried that when she slept over. Put a cross around her neck too, she's one strong demon

Cherry.Bombshell: Stop exposing me!!!

GingerNinja: So you are a demon?

Cherry.Bombshell: ;)

PinkHair_Serpent: I'm think more vampire

Cherry.Bombshell: I do love red ;)

WriterGuy: If you bite me, I'm writing a full expose on how you burned down Thornhill

Cherry.Bombshell: Wow, an expose. I'm quivering in my stilettos.

Nancy_Drew: I'll write an expose about Jason

Nancy_Drew: Actually, I'll let my mom write it...

Cherry.Bombshell: Your blood's probably too sweet anyway. I'd be on my way to Type 2 diabetes

GingerNinja: Wait, is Cheryl ACTUALLY a vampire?

GayKeller: Oh my God

Veronicakins: My dumb, dumb Archiekins....

Cherry.Bombshell: What do you know?

GingerNinja: Am I the only one still shook Betty's bi?

GayKeller: idk, Betty did talk about Roni a lot when she first came into town...

Nancy_Drew: I talked about Cheryl a lot too, it doesn't mean anything

Cherry.Bombshell: EWWWW! Did you seriously have a crush on me, your 3rd cousin?

PinkHair_Serpent: At least she didn't have a crush on her twin brother

Cherry.Bombshell: Serpent scum

WriterGuy: CHERYL

Nancy_Drew: Ignore it, she's just riling you up

Cherry.Bombshell: Never in my 2304 years has anyone understood me as much as you, Betty Cooper

GingerNinja: So you are a vampire

Cherry.Bomshell: ;)


	6. Cheronica vs Choni

**Nancy_Drew changed the name to Cheronica or Choni??**

Veronicakins: You think about the weirdest things at 2 AM don't you?

Nancy_Drew: Yes

GayKeller: I LOVE THEM BOTH!! #THESTRUGGLE

WriterGuy: You ship literally anything gay, don't you?

GayKeller: That's not true

GingerNinja: Dude, you ship me and Jughead.

GayKeller: Maybe stop staring into each other's eyes so intensely and I'll stop shipping it.

WriterGuy: We look at each other normally

GayKeller: I sense some internalised homophobia

PinkHair_Serpent: I would never date Cheryl. Girl's so crazy

Cherry.Bombshell: And you think I'd date you? Ew, as if!

GayKeller: Please, in 5 months you'll both be swooning over each other. All cutesy and shit

Veronicakins: And I'm not into girls. Why would you even add Cheronica, Betty?

Nancy_Drew: You kissed me...

Nancy_Drew: You're super, way-too-nice to Cheryl...

Nancy_Drew: Need I go on?

Nancy_Drew: Cheronica stays. Cheronica is bae

Veronicakins: Did you just use 'bae' unironically?

Nancy_Drew: ...Yes?

Cherry.Bombshell: Ew

Veronicakins: For once we agree on something

GayKeller: I SHIP IT!!!!!

Veronicakins: Please don't

GingerNinja: r e j e c t e d

Cherry.Bombshell: Shut it moron or I will make you eat your own sweaty trainers

GingerNinja: I was hacked?

Cherry.Bombshell: No, but I will hack you to death if you don't shut up

GingerNinja: My little sister typed that?

Cherry.Bombshell: You don't have a little sister

WriterGuy: You better run, man

Nancy_Drew: But seriously, Cheronica or Choni?

PinkHair_Serpent: Cheronica. No way I'm dating Cheryl

GayKeller: Hard choice but I'll say Choni

GayKeller: No wait, Cheronica

GayKeller: Ugh, idk!! A poly relationship?

WriterGuy: Cheronica, for my best friend's sanity

PinkHair_Serpent: Thanks, Jug

Cherry.Bombshell: Yeah thanks for insinuating I would turn your best friend insane, Forsythe.

WriterGuy: Shit

WriterGuy: If I die tonight, you all know why...

GingerNinja: Choni, I'm not having Cheryl dating my girlfriend

Nancy_Drew: Cheryl, which do you ship?

Cherry.Bombshell: Neither. I ship myself with myself, the only person good enough for me

PinkHair_Serpent: Wow....

WriterGuy: More like the only one crazy enough for you

Cherry.Bombshell: Say that to my face, Forsythe

Nancy_Drew: I ship Cheronica in case anyone was wondering :)

Veronicakins: Traitor

Nancy_Drew: V, you literally are constantly helping Cheryl...

Veronicakins: I suppose. Btw, still haven't got a thanks for that, Cheryl

Cherry.Bombshell: I don't thank losers

Veronicakins: Wow

Cherry.Bombshell: In awe of my beauty? Try not to drool too much, Lodge

Veronicakins: No, I'm actually in awe of your insanity.

Cherry.Bombshell: Funny, I was just admiring yours

Veronicakins: Oh so you were just staring off into thin air? Not really helping your reputation, Blossom

Veronicakins: Btw, how's your brother and your father?

**Cherry.Bombshell signed out**

GingerNinja: I think you might've gone a little bit too far with that one, Ronnie

WriterGuy: As much as I loathe Cheryl Blossom... Bringing up her drug-dealer dad and dead twin in an argument isn't cool

Veronicakins: I know... I feel really bad :(

Veronicakins: I'm officially a horrible person

Nancy_Drew: It's ok, we can sort this out. I'll add her back

GayKeller: Yea, just say sorry and I'm sure it'll be fine

Veronicakins: Thanks guys

PinkHair_Serpent: You're welcome :)

WriterGuy: You're literally the one person who didn't say anything...

Nancy_Drew: Cheryl, Veronica has something to say to you

Cherry.Bombshell: I don't care

**Cherry.Bombshell signed out**

PinkHair_Serpent: You fucked up

Veronicakins: Thanks for the observation, Captain Obvious...

PinkHair_Serpent: You're welcome

WriterGuy: Not funny

PinkHair_Serpent: Funnier than you

Veronicakins: Whatever, I'm going to have a private chat with Cheryl...

WriterGuy: Try not to die


	7. I'm Sorry :(

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don't even know what this was. Just go with it???

**Veronicakins added Cherry.Bombshell in a private chat**

**Veronicakins named the chat 'I'm really, really sorry Cheryl please forgive me'**

Cherry.Bombshell: What do you want, bitch?

Veronicakins: I just wanted to say sorry

Veronicakins: It so wasn't cool and I feel like an utter bitch for saying it

Veronicakins: Forgive me???

Cherry.Bombshell: Mommy's throwing a party for my 9 year old cousin

Cherry.Bombshell: She loves both clowns and Native Americans so we need someone who would humiliate themselves enough to put on the costume

Veronicakins: You want me to dress up as a Indian Clown?

Cherry.Bombshell: Yes

Veronicakins: What's this cousin called again?

Cherry.Bombshell: Libby, she's a Libra

Cherry.Bombshell: She also loves being called Libby the Libra

Veronicakins: Libby the Libra sounds kinda racist

Cherry.Bombshell: Not kind of, very racist

Cherry.Bombshell: She supports Trump and calls Josie the n-word. Libby the Libra is a racist bitch

Veronicakins: And you want me, a Latina woman to dress up as an Indian Clown for your racist bitch cousin Libby the Libra?

Cherry.Bombshell: Yes

Cherry.Bombshell: You should know, she'll probably ask if you're here legally and if you'll steal the cutlery. Libby the Libra thinks that's a thing that Mexicans do

Veronicakins: You're not going to forgive me until I do this, will you?

Cherry.Bombshell: You talked about how my drug-dealer dad shot my best friend and twin brother Jay-Jay

Veronicakins: Point taken

Veronicakins: Is there another option?

Cherry.Bombshell: I could tell Libby the Libra where you live

Cherry.Bombshell: She'll egg it

Veronicakins: Well shit

Cherry.Bombshell: Shit indeed

Veronicakins: When's Libby the Libra's b-day?

Cherry.Bombshell: Next Thursday

Veronicakins: Can I see the costume I'll be wearing?

Cherry.Bombshell: I don't think that's a good idea

Veronicakins: Just show me

**Cherry.Bombshell sent a picture**

Veronicakins: Oh wow

Veronicakins: That's just... Wow

Veronicakins: Somehow it's racist, sexist and homophobic at the same time

Cherry.Bombshell: I know

Veronicakins: And you expect me to wear this?

Cherry.Bombshell: If you want my forgiveness and an egg-free house...

Veronicakins: So I basically have no choice

Cherry.Bombshell: Pretty much

Veronicakins: Have I mentioned you're kind of a bitch?

Cherry.Bombshell: I think we've established I'm more than just kind of a bitch

Cherry.Bombshell: Also, Libby the Libra says she can't wait to finally meet a real life....

Cherry.Bombshell: I'm not even going to finish that sentence...

Veronicakins: I've officially died and gone to hell

Cherry.Bombshell: Her Dad's know bringing a shotgun so you might actually die

Veronicakins: Let me guess, he's now bringing a shotgun because I'm coming???

Cherry.Bombshell: My family is very racist

Cherry.Bombshell: And sexist

Cherry.Bombshell: And homophobic

Cherry.Bombshell: And Cherylphobic

Veronicakins: Cherylphobic?

Cherry.Bombshell: It's a Blossom thing. Kind of like homophobic but aimed directly at me...

Veronicakins: I'm sorry Cheryl :(

Cherry.Bombshell: You've already said sorry

Veronicakins: Not about your messed-up family

Veronicakins: Just know, me and the others aren't Cherylphobic

Cherry.Bombshell: Thanks. But you still have to wear the costume for Libby the Libra

Veronicakins: Damn.


	8. WTF Is Going On?

Nancy_Drew: I can't believe you actually dressed up as a racist, sexist, homophobic Indian Clown for Cheryl's cousin Libby the Libra...

Cherry.Bombshell: Me neither. I'm actually low-key touched

Veronicakins: Well, I'm glad you're happy Cheryl. I'm still trying to get back my dignity

GayKeller: Check back in time before you put the Indian Clown costume on?

WriterGuy: This shit could only happen in Riverdale

PinkHair_Serpent: Or Rosewood

GingerNinja: What's Rosewood???

Veronicakins: Is that a real question?

GingerNinja: Yeah...

Veronicakins: So when Betty asked if Alison or Cheryl would win you had no idea what was going on?

GingerNinja: You're mad aren't you?

Veronicakins: Yes. But luckily I'm much kinder than Cheryl so all I request is me and you in your bedroom, tonight

GingerNinja: I can do that ;)

Cherry.Bombshell: STOP! YOU NEED TO STOP! GET HELP, GET HELP! YOU NEED HELP!!! YOU NEED PRIVATE CHATS GET THIS OUT OF MY SIIIIGHT!!!!

GayKeller: Drama queen alert

GayKeller: But I low-key agree. Get this hetero shit outta here!!!

GingerNinja: Sorry guys :/

Cherry.Bombshell: Try saying that to my eyesight. It's now ruined.

Nancy_Drew: Who's most likely to kill themselves?

WriterGuy: DARK!!!

GayKeller: Considering Cheryl ACTUALLY tried to kill herself.... Cheryl

Cherry.Bombshell: Ugh that was like 3 months ago. After I burned down Thornhill, I'm better than ever

WriterGuy: "After I burned down Thornhill"

WriterGuy: Yeah sounds like you're coping really well Cheryl...

Nancy_Drew: Who's most likely to make-out with their twin brother?

Veronicakins: Cheryl's the only one with a twin...

PinkHair_Serpent: Even if she wasn't.... CHERYL

Nancy_Drew: Most likely to kill a bunny?

WriterGuy: Are all these answers Cheryl?

Cherry.Bombshell: Okay says Mr. I Obsess Over Murder Cases Like A Creep And Am Also In A Gang

GayKeller: That's a really long last name

PinkHair_Serpent: Also, Serpents are a family not a gang

Cherry.Bombshell: Gross. Get this gang shit out of gc. I'm already traumatized by the PDA

GingerNinja: I SAID WE WERE SORRY

Veronicakins: You're sorry, I'm not #sorrynotsorry

Nancy_Drew: Most likely to wear white to a dead twin brother's funeral?

Cherry.Bombshell: I actually did that, so me

PinkHair_Serpent: For real? Slay

GayKeller: SLAY QUEEN. Still LIVING for that outfit

Cherry.Bombshell: Thanks Kevin xxx

Veronicakins: Betty, why do keep asking questions that are all about Cheryl?

Nancy_Drew: I have a crush... On Cheryl....

Cherry.Bombshell: Excuse me?

Nancy_Drew: You're really cute and hot :)

Cherry.Bombshell: I know

Veronicakins: CHERYL'S YOUR 3RD COUSIN!!!!

Nancy_Drew: I know it's wrong but... It feels so right...

Nancy_Drew: Like Romeo and Juliet but... Juliet and Juliet :)

WriterGuy: And we're dating

Nancy_Drew: Sorry Jughead :(

Nancy_Drew: Cheryl's hotter than you

GingerNinja: This is weird

PinkHair_Serpent: Yea... I thought Cheryl was the one into incest

Cherry.Bombshell: I DIDN'T HAVE SEX WITH MY DEAD TWIN BROTHER YOU GROSS BITCH

PinkHair_Serpent: Calm down, geez

Nancy_Drew: Marry me, Cheryl?

Cherry.Bombshell: WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?

GayKeller: Thank God I made popcorn. This is so juicy

Nancy_Drew: I'm in love, that's what's wrong!!!! I LOVE CHERYL MAJORIE BLOSSOM!!!

Cherry.Bombshell: HOW DO YOU KNOW MY MIDDLE NAME YOU STALKER????

Nancy_Drew: BECAUSE I LOVE YOU AND YOUR HOTNESS!!!

Cherry.Bombshell: Oh... Thanks :)

Cherry.Bombshell: Also, ew, I'm not marrying you.

Veronicakins: WHAT IS GOING ON???

Nancy_Drew: OMG POLLY JUST RUINED MY LIFE!!!! SHE CAME TO RIVERDALE TO VISIT AND SHE DID THIS!!!!!

Nancy_Drew: THIS WAS POLLY'S REVENGE!!! PLEASE BELIEVE ME!!!

Cherry.Bombshell: I don't know.... I AM pretty hot...

WriterGuy: Thank God. It was just Polly, false alarm, false alarm

PinkHair_Serpent: It was kind of funny. Tell your sister she's cool, Betty

Nancy_Drew: Polly's not cool. She's EVIL!!!

Cherry.Bombshell: She's cooler than you. Also, Polly if you're reading this...

Cherry.Bombshell: You're also super sweet, kind, amazing, the best, smart, cute, great and every other nice adjective :)

PinkHair_Serpent: Incest much?

Cherry.Bombshell: SHUT UP YOU DUMB HOE!!!

Veronicakins: asgeiuewc c38 uc 943i94i39w9 m3-0

WriterGuy: What the hell?

GingerNinja: feuhgri 4ur4i 3i p9 u4u9vuc94im4, 04-qc

GayKeller: Ew... Straight people sex :(

Nancy_Drew: UGH!!! I CAN HEAR IT!!!!!

Nancy_Drew: Can I come over Jughead?

PinkHair_Serpent: We're doing a thing for Peabody

GayKeller: I thought you sorted that out

WriterGuy: She came back to town :(

Nancy_Drew: Kevin?

GayKeller: My Dad still hates you bc you thought he was the Black Hood

Nancy_Drew: I want to slap Past Me :(

Nancy_Drew: Cheryl... Can I come over???

PinkHair_Serpent: So you can propose in person?

WriterGuy: Shut up

Cherry.Bombshell: You can come over if you buy me cherries and a strawberry milkshake

Nancy_Drew: Is that it?

Cherry.Bombshell: Yeah. I want to piss Mommy off

Cherry.Bombshell: Cooper's piss Mommy off

GayKeller: Thank God. I was thinking you were the Good Cheryl Clone for a second there

Cherry.Bombshell: Eat shit

GayKeller: Ew, no thanks

Nancy_Drew: Whatever, I'll be there. Veronica's literally moaning at the top of her lungs :(

Nancy_Drew: So not something you want to hear from your best friend :(

GayKeller: Unless they're hot

Nancy_Drew: No

GayKeller: Yes

Nancy_Drew: No

Cherry.Bombshell: Get a life

GayKeller: Bitch

Cherry.Bomshell: Want a medal, Einstein?

GayKeller: Yes

Cherry.Bombshell: Cool. Should be at our house within 5-6 business days

GayKeller: That's great

Nancy_Drew: I'm here and scared to wake your demon mother. Open the door.

Cherry.Bombshell: Whatever loser.


	9. We Need To Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry it's been LITERALLY forever. Please forgive me? Also this chapter is very different from current canon but let me live okay? I just find Hal and Penelope a funny couple lol.

**DieBlossomDie1521 started a chat called We Need To Talk**

**DieBlossomDie1521 added Nancy_Drew, WriterGuy, SoberSerpent, AliceCooper'sABitch, Cherry.Bombshell, DieCooperDie2758 and Hal.Cooper**

Cherry.Bombshell: Ew why am I here?

Nancy_Drew: Good question. Mom, what's going on?

DieBlossomDie1521: Can you girls not read? We all need to talk

DieCooperDie2758: About your hideous fashion sense? You look like you scavenge your clothes out of a trash can

Hal.Cooper: LOL!

AliceCooper'sABitch: DAD!!!

WriterGuy: Seriously, why am I here? I haven't done anything wrong... Have I?

DieBlossomDie1521: Not yet, but it's only a matter of time, Serpent scum.

SoberSerpent: Serpent scum? Funny, since that's exactly what you were when we were kids.

Cherry.Bombshell: Being a hypocrite is better than mopping up a teenage boy's blood then stuffing him into a freezer isn't it?

WriterGuy: Wow... Things just got dark real quick...

DieBlossomDie1521: Alright, that's enough anarchy. Polly, Betty, it's time you know Penelope and Hal have been having an affair... And your good friend Cheryl knew all about it, didn't you?

AliceCooper'sABitch: "good friends" LOL

WriterGuy: Do you really expect anyone to be surprised that Cheryl would betray her 3rd cousin's trust?

DieCooperDie2758: It sounds like something a bitchy, over-dramatic, loveless, stupid girl like Cheryl would do. 

Cherry.Bombshell: You know what they say, mother, like mother like daughter.

Nancy_Drew: BUUUUUUUUUURN!!!!

**DieCooperDie2758 left the group**

DieBlossomDie1521: Pussy

DieBlossomDie1521: But seriously, does no one care that my husband cheated on dinosaur Blossom?

Nancy_Drew: I mean, Dad isn't exactly a great secret keeper....

Hal.Cooper: THAT'S NOT TRUE!

Cherry.Bomshell: You have all the stealth of the Marshmellow Man. I have second-hand embarrassment whenever you try to sneak around.

AliceCooper'sABitch: Cheryl's on a roll lol

Cherry.Bombshell: Does this mean I'm the godmother?

AliceCooper'sABitch: You can be the godfather??

Cherry.Bombshell: YES YES I'LL TAKE IT!!!!

Nancy_Drew: LOL

Hal.Cooper: Whatever, I don't need this. I deserve better than this.

DieBlossomDie1521: Better is Penelope Blossom now?

Hal.Cooper: No need to take your jealousy out on her.

DieBlossomDie1521: Jealousy? That's a funny way of spelling hatred/pity...

Cherry.Bomshell: lmao

**Hal.Cooper left the group**

WriterGuy: This still doesn't explain why I'm here....

DieBlossomDie1521: Cheryl, leave the chat.

Cherry.Bombshell: LOL no, this is too entertaining

Nancy_Drew: Mom, whatever it is, Cheryl can hear it too

DieBlossomDie1521: You expect me to trust a BLOSSOM?

Cherry.Bombshell: Any worse than trusting a dirty Serpent??

WriterGuy: CHERYL!

SoberSerpent: You might be a teenager, but I'm five seconds away from knocking all your teeth out

DieBlossomDie1521: Fine, Cheryl stays. ONLY to piss off the Serpents. 

Cherry.Bombshell: I'm happy with that

AliceCooper'sABitch: Great, now what is it?

Nancy_Drew: Yea, you're making me kind of nervous...

DieBlossomDie1521: I had a son, called Charles...

SoberSerpent: You don't have to do this, Alice

DieBlossomDie1521: Yes, I do

WriterGuy: What's going on?

DieBlossomDie1521: Charles was mine and...

DieBlossomDie1521: FP's

Nancy_Drew: WHAT?!

AliceCooper'sABitch: ARE YOU SERIOUS?

WriterGuy: This can't be real...

Cherry.Bombshell: Am I the only one who's not surprised?

WriterGuy: YES!!!

DieBlossomDie1521: I know this is a lot to take in but you need to know this

Nancy_Drew: Wait, where is he now?

SoberSerpent: Dunno. We never found him after that

DieBlossomDie1521: All I know is his name and birthday.

AliceCooper'sABitch: We should find him

WriterGuy: What that's crazy

AliceCooper'sABitch: After all these years, he could finally be a part of our family. Wouldn't that be great? For everyone?

Cherry.Bombshell: Yeah, until he turns out to be a murdering psychopath.

DieBlossomDie1521: For once, I agree with the Blossom. It's a horrible idea

Nancy_Drew: But Mom, he could be anywhere, he could need us. WE could help him

WriterGuy: Betty's right, this could be a real opportunity

DieBlossomDie1521: We're not doing this and that's the end of the discussion.

Nancy_Drew: Maybe you're not...

Cherry.Bombshell: LOL can't wait to go shopping for the funeral

SoberSerpent: Listen to the rich bitch Blossom, kids.

WriterGuy: WHATEVER, we don't have to listen to you!

Cherry.Bombshell: Someone's an angsty teen. What, are you going to slam your bedroom door and whine about how no one understands you too?

WriterGuy: MaYbE I wIlL

Cherry.Bombshell: Cringe level 1000000000000%

SoberSerpent: Jughead, you're grounded

WriterGuy: YOU STILL CAN'T STOP US!!!!

Nancy_Drew: YEA WE'RE GOING TO FIND CHARLES!!!!

AliceCooper'sABitch: YOU CAN'T STOP US!!!!!!

**WriterGuy, Nancy_Drew and AliceCooper'sABitch left the group**

Cherry.Bombshell: That awkward moment when you're on the parent's side...

DieBlossomDie1521: That awkward moment when you agree with a bitchy, rich, crazy Blossom

SoberSerpent: This is weird

DieBlossomDie1521: Yea

Cherry.Bombshell: Let's never speak of this again

DieBlossomDie1521: Well, first we have to stop those crazy kids

SoberSerpent: You forgot stupid

Cherry.Bombshell: Literally only helping for the entertainment

DieBlossomDie1521: Who says we want your help, Blossom?

Cherry.Blossom: So you're going to come back to school to keep an eye on them or what?

SoberSerpent: Blossom's right

Cherry.Bombshell: Shut up, murder accomplice

SoberSerpent: Psycho

Cherry.Bombshell: Alcholic

SoberSerpent: Incesteous 

Cherry.Bombshell: Druggie

SoberSerpent: Bitch

DieBlossomDie1521: If we're going to stop these stupid kids we're going to have to spend a lot less time fighting.

Cherry.Bombshell: Only to save my brother's adorable children...

DieBlossomDie1521: You've never even met them

DieBlossomDie1521: Polly forbid you

Cherry.Bombshell: I'm the god-father and aunt. I don't need to see their adorable faces in real life to love them

SoberSerpent: Still a better love story than Twilight.

DieBlossomDie1521: Enough talk, we need a plan


	10. What's going on?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ANGST AHEAD!!! Also, Betty is kind of mean, so is Jughead so sorry for that. Aaand to put the cherry on top, Cheryl's emotions are kind of all over the place.

Nancy_Drew: I hate Cheryl so much rn

PinkHair_Serpent: Everyone does

WriterGuy: Yea but she BETRAYED us!!!!!!!

Cherry.Bombshell: Oh please, you'll thank me when I save you all from getting KILLED!

GingerNinja: What's going on?

GayKeller: For once, I'm as confused as Archie.

Veronicakins: I thought you said you'd ease up on Archie?? :(

GayKeller: Couldn't resist

Veronicakins: Whatever, what's going on?

WriterGuy: Alice Cooper had a baby with my dad so me, Betty and Polly are looking for him

Cherry.Bombshell: OMG this is so stupid

Cherry.Bombshell: You're like 20 years too late, he'll probably murder all of you out of resentment

Cherry.Bombshell: MY GODCHILDREN MY POOR GODCHILDREN!!!

PinkHair_Serpent: Ugh, Polly made you the godmother finally? Stupid choice

Nancy_Drew: No, Cheryl's the godfather

GingerNinja: Wot?

Cherry.Bombshell: Polly said I could be the godfather, I feel blessed :)

GayKeller: You're usually a crazy bitch, but you're actually being pretty cute right now 

Veronicakins: Yea, I kinda like it

Cherry.Bombshell: CHERYL BLOSSOM IS NOT CUTE!!!!!

WriterGuy: No, you're not, you're a bitch. A psycho bitch!!!!

Cherry.Bombshell: At least I'm not a cringey angsty teen

PinkHair_Serpent: Pics or it didn't happen lol

WriterGuy: MY OWN BEST FRIEND??????

**Cheryl added CRIIIIIINGE-ew.jpg**

GayKeller: Gross, I need a shower

Veronicakins: We are reaching cringe levels that should not be reached

PinkHair_Serpent: Lol, when did Veronica become a dork?

Veronicakins: More like when did Cheryl become cute??

Cherry.Bombshell: I'M NOT CUTE!!!

Cherry.Bombshell: But Betty, I saw Juniper and Dagwood's Instagram. Tell Polly I'm sending her a box of baby clothes, new toys, baby food and paints for the nursery <3

GayKeller: AWWWWWWWWW!!!

GingerNinja: Wait... Cheryl's an aunt, that's weird.

GingerNinja: OMG!! Betty's an aunt too

Veronicakins: I'm going to pretend you didn't say that

Veronicakins: Also why not just text Polly that yourself? You must have her number

Cherry.Bombshell: Polly blocked me because I kept sending her baby stuff and begging to be the godmother. I also sent her a 2 AM text about how to best breastfeed a baby. She got kinda freaked out. We don't really talk anymore :( :( :(

GayKeller: Now you're cute and sad

Cherry.Bombshell: Shut up

Cherry.Bombshell: Also Betty, tell Polly I'm also trying to knit baby hats, sweaters and blankets

Nancy_Drew: K.

Veronicakins: Wooooow!!!!

GayKeller: Don't be mean to Cheryl! She's being cute, this is a rare occasion we might never see again!!!

PinkHair_Serpent: Also, I kind of agree with Cheryl. This is a really bad idea

Veronicakins: We all agree with Cheryl

GayKeller: Don't forget DILF Serpent Jones and Mama Cooper

GingerNinja: I literally have no clue what's going on

WriterGuy: HOW CAN YOU NOT TAKE OUR SIDE???!!?? WE'RE YOUR FRIENDS!!!

Veronicakins: Yea, but you're also wrong so...

Nancy_Drew: Whatever you guys suck

Cherry.Bombshell: You're still going to pass the message onto Polly right?

Nancy_Drew: No

GayKeller: BETTY!!!

Nancy_Drew: What? Cheryl didn't even try to defend us! She just shoved us under the bus, like she always does!

Veronicakins: You need to get your priorities straight

**Nancy_Drew and WriterGuy left the group**

Cherry.Bombshell: But... But Polly won't know I'm sending her baby stuff and MAKING baby stuff :(

Cherry.Bombshell: Do you know hard it is to knit? Do you know how long it takes to make a single square??? A LONG TIME A REALLY FUCKING LONG TIME!!!!

Veronicakins: It's okay, we'll pass the message on

PinkHair_Serpent: Damn, you're super emotional today...

Cherry.Bombshell: Yea... It's mine and Jason's b-day today

GayKeller: Shit

PinkHair_Serpent: Damn... That's rough...

Veronicakins: I'm really sorry

GingerNinja: So like... Will there be cake??

Cherry.Bombshell: No. I'm just sitting by JJ's grave... Wearing his sweater... Alone... Crying...

GayKeller: Shit.

Cherry.Bombshell: Yea...

Veronicakins: Do you want me to come over?

Cherry.Bombshell: No, I want to see Juniper and Dagwood. So I guess I'll just stalk their Instagram and think about how great of a dad Jason could've been

GingerNinja: That's depressing

GayKeller: Shut up, Archie

GingerNinja: Sorry

Veronicakins: Why didn't you tell us sooner? :(

Cherry.Bombshell: You have stuff going on I guess. I didn't want to bother you...

PinkHair_Serpent: OMG, the feels

GayKeller: That's it, I'm going to buy you a present and walk my ass over to you. No one's stopping me

Veronicakins: I'll come with

PinkHair_Serpent: Same

GingerNinja: I'll bring the cake

Cherry.Bombshell: Thanks guys :)

GingerNinja: I don't have cake but I have gummy worms and Sour Patch Kids so I'll bring those instead.

Cherry.Bombshell: JJ's favourite candy was Sour Patch Kids

GingerNinja: So I shouldn't bring them?

Cherry.Bombshell: No, bring them. It's Jason's b-day too. I want to be close to him 

GayKeller: Awww

GayKeller: You're so cute rn. If I wasn't gay I'd fall in love <3

Cherry.Bombshell: :)


	11. 0 to 1000 real quick

**DieBlossomDie1521 created a group called Team Serpent Blossom Cooper**

**DieBlossomDie1521 added SoberSerpent and Cherry.Bombshell to the group**

SoberSerpent: We're on the same team now?

DieBlossomDie1521: Don't let it give you a big head, I'm doing this for my daughters, not you.

SoberSerpent: Whatever keeps you asleep at night, Ali ;)

DieBlossomDie1521: Keep talking like that and I might just punch you in the face

SoberSerpent: Kinky ;)

Cherry.Bombshell: Lol, so much sexual tension

DieBlossomDie1521: Don't make me kick you out of the chat

Cherry.Bombshell: So you can send the gross Serpent nudes?

DieBlossomDie1521: You're walking on thin ice, Blossom

SoberSerpent: Yea, if Ali doesn't kick you out, I might have to

DieBlossomDie1521: Now that we have that out the way, how are we going to stop our nightmare children from finding our illegitimate son and bringing him back?

SoberSerpent: I don't know, but we better come up with something quick. Jug's been really moody and annoyed at me lately

DieBlossomDie1521: Same goes for Polly and Betty :(

Cherry.Bombshell: Trust me, I noticed

SoberSerpent: Shut it, Blossom

Cherry.Bombshell: Like you shut up about my father shooting my twin brother in the head?

DieBlossomDie1521: This is about our children going on a stupid mission that will probably endanger their lives and possibly my grandchildren's, not our personal vendettas.

Cherry.Bombshell: To be clear, I'm doing this for JJ's darling children. I couldn't care any less about your spawn

SoberSerpent: Never asked

DieBlossomDie1521: We need to come up with a plan.

Cherry.Bombshell: We could say Charles died

DieBlossomDie1521: That might be the Blossom way, but we're doing this the RIGHT way (something you CLEARLY lack experience with)

Cherry.Bombshell: I don't see you coming up with anything

SoberSerpent: Maybe we should find Charles first then make sure they never do

Cherry.Bombshell: Please knowing you, you mean murdering your own illegitimate son

DieBlossomDie1521: I say we give them a new mystery. Knowing them, they'll be distracted by the simplest of things. Maybe Cheryl can start drinking?

Cherry.Bombshell: I'm not FP Jones

SoberSerpent: That's not a bad idea. Maybe Cheryl can get herself knocked up so they try to find out the baby daddy

Cherry.Bombshell: WHY THE HELL DO ALL THESE SCENARIOS INVOLVE ME???

DieBlossomDie1521: There's nothing those kids like sinking their teeth into than a good ole Blossom Mystery

DieBlossomDie1521: And we're both too connected to Charles, they won't be distacted enough

Cherry.Bombshell: If this really needs to involve me, I have a better idea... How about I go missing Jason Blossom style? Spend a week in Malibo, then come back acting shady and mysterious. Those idiots will be hounding me at every opportunity.

DieBlossomDie1521: You just want to go to Malibo

Cherry.Bombshell: Hey, it's a win-win. Your stupid kids don't die because you were too stupid not to use a condom (doesn't ANYONE in this town have contraception?) and I get to sunbathe on the beaches of Malibo

SoberSerpent: If we're gonna do this, you need some mysterious circumstances.

DieBlossomDie1521: We need a suicide note

Cherry.Bombshell: Better idea, a FORGED suicide note

SoberSerpent: And here I thought we were gonna do this the clean way?

DieBlossomDie1521: Grow up, Serpent. There is no clean way.

Cherry.Bombshell: Never thought I'd say this, but I agree with the Cooper hag.

DieBlossomDie1521: Shut it, Blossom. Before I cut you


	12. A Typical Riverdale Episode

**NancyDrew changed the name to What happened to Cheryl?!?!?!**

PinkHaired_Serpent: Thought you guys were looking for your brother?

GayKeller: Yea, I thought you guys hated Cheryl now? Because she was stopping you from finding your brother?

WriterGuy: That was before Sheriff Keller found Cheryl's forged suicide note

NancyDrew: And she disappeared into THIN AIR!!

Veronicakins: Geez, guys keep up

GingerNinja: Yea, it's so obvious

GayKeller: Whatever, they'll be over it in like a week. Wanna get some popcorn and watch it all unfold?

PinkHaired_Serpent: Sure. Maybe we can make it a background characters party?

GayKeller: Good idea! I'll invite Josie and Reggie.

PinkHaired_Serpent: I'll invite Sweet Pea and Fangs. Maybe FP too?

GayKeller: Nah, this is more of a 'main background character' mission. He's like a parent, he'll probably have his own story line.

PinkHaired_Serpent: True dat...

NancyDrew: GUYS STOP DISRESPECTING CHERYL!! WE LOVE HER!!!!!!!

WriterGuy: Yea, we need to find out what happened to her

GingerNinja: How about we look through a bunch of old yearbooks from the 1950s?

WriterGuy: Good idea, me and Betty will threaten to expose The Sisters of Quiet Mercy

PinkHaired_Serpent: When are you ever going to actually expose them?

Veronicakins: Umm... NEVER!!!!

GayKeller: Let me guess, 'the butler did it'? 

PinkHaired_Serpent: LMAO

GingerNinja: Wait, Smithers did it?

Veronicakins: OMG THAT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE! HE'S ALWAYS LURKING AROUND!

GayKeller: Yea... Because it's his job to do what you tell him to. He kind of has to be around for you to do that.

PinkHaired_Serpent: Hahahaha our background characters group chat is blowing up!!

WriterGuy: All we need to do is prove he killed Cheryl and we'll be sorted.

Veronicakins: I'll break into his quarters

NancyDrew: I'll go interrogate Mr and Mrs Lodge

WriterGuy: I'll look through some old photo albums and talk to some old people

GingerNinja: I'll go to Football Practice and yell at Reggie

**GayKeller took a screenshot**

PinkHaired_Serpent: How do you even know Cheryl is dead?

NancyDrew: I haven't seen her since yesterday in AP History so...

Veronicakins: Yea, Cheryl isn't in Algebra. She always turns up to Algebra

GayKeller: She could be kidnapped

WriterGuy: Impossible

Veronicakins: I think I'd know if Smithers was holding my BEST FRIEND hostage in my own house

GingerNinja: Logic, guys. Ever heard of it?

GingerNinja: Now excuse me as I follow after the guy who I think kidnapped a teenage girl alone

NancyDrew: Good idea :)

WriterGuy: Great job, bro

Veronicakins: LOVE YOU BOOO!

GayKeller: You're gonna die, bitch

GingerNinja: I lost him :(

WriterGuy: We'll get him next time

PinkHaired_Serpent: Are we invisible? Can they not hear us? 

GayKeller: I don't know...

**Veronicakins named the chat to Core Four Saves Cheryl**

NancyDrew: GO US!!!!

Veronicakins: We're awesome

GingerNinja: YEA!!!

WriterGuy: I guess we are... :3

GayKeller: Whatever, Reggie's throwing a pizza party

PinkHaired_Serpent: These guys suck

GayKeller: They'll be nicer next week. Except Jughead, he needs that Angsty Pushing Everyone Away phase every once in a while. You know, to add conflict

PinkHaired_Serpent: Shit, I'll have to comfort Jughead then

GayKeller: How about we celebrate our week of freedom by going to Reggie's

PinkHaired_Serpent: Lol, just because Fangs is there ;)

GayKeller: Shut up :3

**PinkHaired_Serpent left the chat**

**GayKeller left the chat**

NancyDrew: Now that all the storylines are wrapped up and we feel warm and fluffy inside... We need a cliffhanger.

Veronicakins: I'll add my dad

Don'tTrustMe: Sorry, mija, you like me this week. This is the Alice's Week

GingerNinja: No, it says right here it's your week

WriterGuy: Yea, I've got you down as this week, Mr. Lodge.

Don'tTrustMe: Hold on, let me check.

Don'tTrustMe: I don't have it down. I'm adding Hermione

HELPME: I have it down as FP's week. 

GingerNinja: Let's just add all the parents. It's something to do with the parents.

DieCooperDie2758: For God's sake, it's not me. Keep me out of this peasant chat

**DieCooperDie2758 and Hal.Cooper left the chat**

SoberSerpent: I got nothing

DieBlossomDie1521: I've already dropped a couple bombshells

DIYguy: Sorry folks, just fixing up my bike over here

HELPME: Oh, wait! It's Polly's Week

GingerNinja: Are you sure? I really thought it was Lodge Week

Don'tTrustMe: Just plotting for now. Have to prepare for next week

HELPME: It's going to be a nightmare

Don'tTrustMe: For you that is

AliceCooper'sABitch: Everyone, I have an announcement

DieBlossomDie1521: FINALLY THE CLIFFHANGER!!!

AliceCooper'sABitch: .....I'M RUNNING FOR MAYOR OF RIVERDALE AND ALSO I'M PREGNANT AGAIN!!

NancyDrew: What?!

DieBlossomDie1521: *shocked face*

SoberSerpent: Great cliffhanger

HELPME: Could do better in my sleep...

GingerNinja: WOW! I did not see that coming

Veronicakins: First Smithers killed Cheryl and now THIS?! MY LIFE SUCKS!!!

Don'tTrustMe: That's not until next week when I ruin your life

Veronicakins: Sorry...


	13. Who Should Riverdale's New Mayor Be? (Decisions, decisions)

Veronicakins: We need to do something about Polly running for mayor

NancyDrew: Why? Polly would make a great Mayor. 

WriterGuy: And she has a great plan to improve safety in Riverdale

NancyDrew: Great for economics

WriterGuy: She's planning on knocking down SoDale and replacing it was a homeless shelter

NancyDrew: Then she's going to build a Foster Home where Thornhill used to be

WriterGuy: She's also non-bias towards the Serpents and planning on giving the Southside more places for people to work

GingerNinja: Yea but... My dad's gonna build a pool in my backyard

GingerNinja: THINK ABOUT HOW AWESOME THE POOL IS GOING TO BE!!!

Veronicakins: Who cares about Polly or Fred Andrews?

Veronicakins: My dad's gonna let me buy a CASINO if Mom wins!!

NancyDrew: V, you're still in High School. You wouldn't be able to go into your own casino...

Veronicakins: Who cares? Do you know how awesome casinos are? I'm gonna make so much money

WriterGuy: Well, at least he's putting it in a trust fund. That's kind of responsible

Veronicakins: WHAT? UGH, I'M VOTING FOR FRED! I HATE MY LIFE SO MUCH!!!!

GingerNinja: Your life is SO hard, Ronnie :(

GayKeller: Aren't we supposed to be figuring out what happened to Cheryl?

PinkHaired_Serpent: Yea, I even broke into her house and found a diary entry about Cheryl buying a plane ticket to Malibo. If we buy a ticket now, we could see if she was there and be back by Monday for school :D

WriterGuy: We've moved on from that

Veronicakins: Keep up, guys

PinkHaired_Serpent: But... We need money, we were hoping you and your rich ass parents could get us to Malibo...

GayKeller: That was kind of the whole plan. Without that, we might never find out if Cheryl actually is in Malibo or not.

GingerNinja: I can't believe you guys are being so selfish!

GingerNinja: Veronica's life is already hard enough without you pestering her for money for stupid stuff like that!!

NancyDrew: I really can't believe you guys...

WriterGuy: I thought you were different, Toni. That you didn't care about materialistic stuff like that

Veronicakins: You guys are the WORST

GayKeller: What?

PinkHaired_Serpent: OMG. You guys are so stupid

GayKeller: How about we just go find someone else who's rich. I mean... There's got to be SOME rich people other than the Blossom's and Lodge's right?

PinkHaired_Serpent: How about Reggie? His house is pretty rich looking.

GayKeller: All our houses like that. But we're all just average

PinkHaired_Serpent: Well, shit. I guess we're never finding Cheryl...

**GayKeller left the chat**

**PinkHaired_Serpent left the chat**

Veronicakins: FINALLY, now we can talk about important stuff.

NancyDrew: Like what Polly should name her new baby?

WriterGuy: I'm thinking Jukebox

GingerNinja: DUDE!

WriterGuy: Yeah?

GingerNinja: That's such......

GingerNinja: A GOOD NAME!!!!

Veronicakins: Ikr

NancyDrew: Well, I guess I'm naming our child then...


	14. GUESS WHO'S BACK!

Cherry.Bombshell: Guys, I love Malibu

SoberSerpent: Huh... I almost forgot you were actually alive

Cherry.Bombshell: Just like I wish I could forget the fact you jammed my brother's dead body into a freezer like a tub of ice cream.

DieBlossomDie1521: This chat is for emergencies only

Cherry.Bombshell: This IS an emergency. I have none of your stupid, idiot children to talk to. I even miss that bitch Toni! 

Cherry.Bombshell: I have no friends here :(

DieBlossomDie1521: Do you expect us to be surprised by this?

SoberSerpent: Burn

DieBlossomDie1521: I'll burn you if you don't shut the hell up

Cherry.Bombshell: No kinky stuff in the presence of a child. My eyes are too innocent

SoberSerpent: You're into some weird shit if you call that kinky, Blossom

Cherry.Bombshell: Weird shit like kidnapping a teenage boy?

DieBlossomDie1521: Wikl you stop messaging me? I'm helping Polly with her speech for the Mayoral Debate

Cherry.Bombshell: 1, we were messaging EACH OTHER not you and 2, WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME POLLY'S RUNNING FOR MAYOR?????

SoberSerpent: Also pregnant again

Cherry.Bombshell: Polly slept with another man?

SoberSerpent: That's how shit works

DieBlossomDie1521: STOP IT!!!!

SoberSepent: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Cherry.Bombshell: For once

SoberSerpent: Al!

Cherry.Bombshell: TIRED OLD HAG

SoberSerpent: Ally!

Cherry.Bombshell: BITCH

SoberSerpent: Allycat!

DieBlossomDie1521: WHAT?!

SoberSerpent: Thank God. I couldn't think of any other nicknames 

Cherry.Bombshell: I could've gone on for longer

DieBlossomDie1521: You're both pathetic

**DieBlossomDie1521 left the group chat**

SoberSerpent: Well shit

Cherry.Bombshell: That was fun

Cherry.Bombshell: But I still hate your guts

**Cherry.Bombshell left the group chat**

SoberSerpent: And here I thought Gladys would be the only one to leave me

SoberSerpent: And I'm talking to myself

SoberSerpent: This fucking sucks

**SoberSerpent left the group chat**


	15. Cheryl Blossom the Snowman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I'm back. Sorry I haven't posted in so long, writer's block is a bitch :(

**Cherry.Bombshell added GayKeller in a private chat**

**Cherry. Bomshell named the chat 'Malibu sux'**

GayKeller: OMG! I knew you were alive!

Cherry.Bombshell: Of course I am. Cheryl Blossom is too beautiful to die.

GayKeller: Nice to see you're still as self-absorbed as usual

Cherry.Bombshell: You need to get me out of Malibu. I have no friends here, it's just surfer dudes laughing at how I look like a snowman :(

GayKeller: Well, they're not wrong...

Cherry.Bombshell: I'm a sexy vampire, you bitch

GayKeller: Me and Toni already tried to find you. We don't have the money and Veronica wouldn't give us any :(

Cherry.Bombshell: I used all the money I brought on strawberry milkshakes :(

Cherry.Bombshell: I can't believe those bitches didn't even try to find me

GayKeller: They still think Smithers killed you

Cherry.Bombshell: Who?

GayKeller: Veronica's butler

GayKeller: They stopped looking after like a week, they got distracted by the Mayor Race.

Cherry.Bombshell: Those bitches

GayKeller: They're all as hot and dumb as each other, I swear

Cherry.Bombshell: How am I supposed to get out of Malibu? 

GayKeller: Do you really need to leave that desperately?

Cherry.Bombshell: YES! I tried to sunbathe yesterday and my skin's bright red. The girl next to me called my skin a freak of nature :(

GayKeller: I don't know whether to feel sorry for you or laugh at you

Cherry.Bombshell: If you laugh I will skin you alive, Keller

GayKeller: You would have to get out of Malibu first, psycho bitch.

Cherry.Bombshell: Fuck you

GayKeller: I'm gay, Cheryl. Now if you excuse me, I have a bake sale to run

Cherry.Bombshell: There's a bake sale? 

GayKeller: It's a rainbow theme, in honour of my Birthday.

Cherry.Bombshell: I love cakes :(

GayKeller: Everyone does. But I guess you won't be getting any. Have fun with your red skin, at least it'll match your aesthetic

Cherry.Bombshell: My life sux :(

GayKeller: Obviously, you're Cheryl Blossom

Cherry.Bombshell: You're really not helping :(

GayKeller: I wasn't trying to


	16. Girls Trip

**Cherry.Bombshell added Veronicakins to a private chat**

**Cherry.Bombshell named the chat 'You're a bitch'**

Veronicakins: What the fuck? You're alive?

Cherry.Bombshell: Listen here, rich bitch, I've used up all my money. You're coming to Malibu so you can get me the hell out of here

Veronicakins: YOU'RE IN MALIBU?

Veronicakins: And you didn't invite me? I love Malibu, you bitch

Cherry.Bombshell: Well, I kind of needed to sell the whole I'm-totally-dead thing. It wasn't really a girls trip.

Veronicakins: Fine, but next time you fake your death, you're inviting me. 

Cherry.Bombshell: Why should I? You guys only cared about me dying for like a week

Veronicakins: OMG! You're still hung up on that?

Cherry.Bombshell: Of course I am!

Veronicakins: If I apologise do you promise to include me the next time you run away?

Cherry.Bombshell: Yeah, whatever. Just get me out of here :(

Cherry.Bombshell: My skin is LITERALLY bright red

Veronicakins: LOL!! 

Cherry.Bombshell: DO YOU WANT ME TO BURN DOWN THE PEMBROOKE TOO?

Veronicakins: I would start being nice, bitch. I'm your escape plan

Cherry.Bombshell: UGH fine. No burning down homes, just get me out of this hell hole

Veronicakins: Great, for the next fake death I'm thinking of going to Venice

Cherry.Bombshell: OMG I love Italy! Sounds so fun :)

Veronicakins: Well, you better fake your death again soon. I'm YEARNING for a holiday away from my parents

Cherry.Bombshell: I'm thinking in like 6 months time?

Veronicakins: I'll book the tickets 

Cherry.Bombshell: YAY GIRLS TRIP!

Veronicakins: Wait, we should invite Betty, Toni and Kevin

Cherry.Bombshell: OMG yes!

**Cherry.Bombshell added GayKeller, Nancy_Drew and PinkHair_Serpent**

GayKeller: OMG girls trip? I can't wait

PinkHair_Serpent: Yes, this is gonna be so good!

Veronicakins: We should go away for at least 3 months

Cherry.Bombshell: Vacay in Venice? #swooning

Nancy_Drew: IS NO ONE GOING TO TALK ABOUT HOW CHERYL FAKED HER DEATH?

PinkHair_Serpent: Dude, who cares? We're going to Venice!

GayKeller: Unless you want us to leave you out?

Nancy_Drew: I'm just saying, literally a second ago I thought Cheryl was dead :(

Cherry.Bomshell: Yea, and you didn't care that much, did you? We're supposed to be cousins but you didn't even care about my death? 

Nancy_Drew: I cared

Cherry.Bombshell: For a week

GayKeller: Well, this is awkward...

Nancy_Drew: I did care. I just wanted to get over it so I focused on other stuff...

Cherry.Bombshell: So you care about me?

Nancy_Drew: Of course I do 

Cherry.Bombshell: Wow, okay. Um, thanks I guess :)

Nancy_Drew: You're welcome

Veronicakins: #cousingoals

PinkHair_Serpent: Way to ruin the moment. I was enjoying that :(

GayKeller: Yeah, you stupid bitch

Cherry.Bombshell: I feel like I'm already back in Riverdale :)

Nancy_Drew: Awww, did you miss us?

Cherry.Bombshell: Shut up

Nancy_Drew: I love you too, Cheryl


	17. The Choni Chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm a big fan of Choni so I couldn't resist giving them a chapter. Basically Toni and Cheryl being cute, so a pretty fluffy chapter.

**Cherry.Bombshell started chat called I'm Sad**

**Cherry.Bombshell added PinkHair_Serpent**

PinkHair_Serpent: Is there a reason why I'm here???

Cherry.Bombshell: Did you even read the title idiot? I'm sad

PinkHair_Serpent: That doesn't answer my question...

PinkHair_Serpent: I thought you hated my guts. Why do you want a private chat with me?

Cherry.Bombshell: Idk. I guess you kind of cheer me up...

PinkHair_Serpent: Really? 

Cherry.Bombshell: Don't you dare screenshot that, you shady bitch.

PinkHair_Serpent: Too late. It's already my new wallpaper :)

Cherry.Bombshell: Fuck off

PinkHair_Serpent: And there's the bitch we all know and love. Did that cheer you up?

Cherry.Bombshell: …Yes...

PinkHair_Serpent: You're so weird lol

Cherry.Bombshell: Well, at least I'm hot 

PinkHair_Serpent: Can't argue with that ;)

Cherry.Bombshell: Are you flirting with me?

PinkHair_Serpent: If that's what you want...

Cherry.Bombshell: Then I guess that's a yes 

PinkHair_Serpent: Do you flirt like this with all your friends? lol

Cherry.Bombshell: Who else would I flirt with? Jughead?

PinkHair_Serpent: Lol true

PinkHair_Serpent: So you're friends with Jughead too?

Cherry.Bombshell: Shut up

PinkHair_Serpent: I'm just surprised. Most of the time you're threatening to strangle Jughead with his beanie.

Cherry.Bombshell: It's called banter. 

PinkHair_Serpent: Lol maybe tell Jughead that. I'm pretty sure he's scared of you

Cherry.Bombshell: Lol what an idiot

PinkHair_Serpent: I wouldn't feel too special, Bombshell.

PinkHair_Serpent: Yesterday he literally got scared over a bee

Cherry.Bombshell: And he calls himself the Serpent King? Looooooool

PinkHair_Serpent: Ikr. He's literally so stupid sometimes 

Cherry.Bombshell: Omg and that hat! It's literally not even cute and sooooo greasy

PinkHair_Serpent: Fangs dared me to touch it once. It was literally DRIPPING with grease even greasier than McDonald's

Cherry.Bombshell: Ewww TMI

PinkHair_Serpent: For a chick who burned down her house, you're kind of a pussy lol

Cherry.Bombshell: You won't be saying that when I saw you in half

PinkHair_Serpent: See, this is why people think you hate them!! You keep threatening to kill people you like

Cherry.Bombshell: Who says I like you?

PinkHair_Serpent: You earlier in this conversation.

**PinkHair_Serpent added BombshellBeingCute12.jpg**

Cherry.Bombshell: 12? Do you screenshot all the times I've been 'cute'?

PinkHair_Serpent: What? You're a very cute person

Cherry.Bombshell: Omg you're literally obsessed with me!

PinkHair_Serpent: You literally just liked a photo of me from 42 weeks ago so you can't talk

Cherry.Bombshell: That was an accident!

PinkHair_Serpent: So you were just casually stalking my Instagram while messaging me?

Cherry.Bombshell: You have a cute aesthetic

Cherry.Bombshell: ...And you're also very hot...

PinkHair_Serpent: You're so cute :3

Cherry.Bombshell: Oh? Is that 'BombshellBeingCute13'?

PinkHair_Serpent: Maybe...

Cherry.Bombshell: Well, 13's a big milestone. Maybe we should celebrate

Cherry.Bombshell: With Pop's and a movie???

PinkHair_Serpent: Was that your way of asking me out on a date?

Cherry.Bombshell: Maybe

PinkHair_Serpent: Ok... Then let's go on a date :)

Cherry.Bombshell: Are you sure?

PinkHair_Serpent: Yea. I've literally had a crush on you for ages

Cherry.Bombshell: Well then I guess that's kind of two of us haha :)


End file.
